i have crippling cocklust that hasnt been released since i was born this shit sucks ass specially when you get the luck of being born the wrong gender and as you grow older and see the vitality leave your body day by day you wish that the day would come at a party or in public or at a bar that someone just takes intrest in your fucked up personality that was created from a bad upbringing but whatever all that comes your way are fucks with savior complexes or sensitive brutes that want to cuddle with you one second and the other they furl their brow and want to punch you over the slightest disagreement should i just become a whore and sell my body so that i may finally feel the sexual embrace that i so desire or should i wait for possibly years to go by and when the time comes I cant even show my best self to my partner just a tired old husk I abhore people if its not a platonic relationship or a loving friendship but intimate relationships seem so far our of my grasp that sometimes
I wonder if i should even try why not just cut off everyone and live a comfortable silent life instead of yearning for some stupid fuck to come and ruin your life just cause you feel a strong desire to be sexually embraced one day and make the worst friend cause you see no other options